Biggest Fear

From a fear of public speaking
To now reaching for highest of highs
With a fear of being demolished by lime lights
Hope those important to me stay tight
And don’t ask me to make there lives right
We are all still going to Jive
The guys will always be the guys

Please don’t try to make me feel like I need to buy all of you everything you wanted
No need to make me feel like I’m being haunted
This is already daunting
I didn’t choose this callin

Music plays nonstop in my head
With no clue what is going to play next
It just crept up and never left
Decided to be a permanent guest
Made it hard to be like the rest
I failed the social norm test

Tried to live alone
In my own home
I outgrew that place before I moved in

It felt laced with conformity
Shouting get away from me quickly
I think I’ve always known I’m different than the majority
Took my own disorderly conduct
To make lyrical pot lucks

After finally performing I got out of the mental rut
My mind stopped roaming
Found a new addiction
Nothing beat seeing y’all enjoy my lines
That I write
When I start thinking the wrong is right

The nervous gut feeling always lights up
When something big is about to happen
Let’s have a small recaption

Last time I felt like this
I broke my wrist
Dislocated an ankle
After the majority of the danger stopped
I shouted I located my dream

My mom tried to persuade me to follow music
After eighth grade
But I was to afraid to perform on a stage
In headlights
With faces mocking you in the shade
Finally made the trade from saying I might die
To let’s give this life thing a try

But I ain’t going to lie
I’m still a wreck inside
Still a nervous nelly When it comes to public speaking

Hoping to find someone to make beats sooner or later
So I can stop being my own self hater
Don’t know how to be a musical creator
If you can show me cool
If not at least be my musical translator
Pair my lyrics
With your beats
Can leave people covered in there own drool

I need to get off this mic and cool
Feel myself getting hot
Not in the mood for letting those feelings take the main stage

Goodbye before the rain starts leaking out my eyes
Fuck my fear public speaking
I hope it dies